The other night, as Trish and I were watching the evening news, our State’s Governor was shown imploring people to stay home as much as possible to reduce the spread of the coronavirus.  I know that staying home is a challenge for a lot of people, especially if you have young kids who should be in school or work at a job that is not amenable to working from home.  However, at this pronouncement, Trish and I looked at each other and suppressed (sort of) wry smiles.  Telling two introverts to stay home is not exactly a hardship.  Herewith, a little lighter side of the impact of the coronavirus.  We could all use a bit of a laugh right now.

On Sharing the Same Space  Our house is not huge but it’s big enough.  Big enough for us to be in totally different parts of the house and not see each other all day.  Except we don’t do that.  For some reason, the four of us (me, Trish, the two cats) always seem to end up in the same 10 square feet and we’re mostly ok with that.  It’s like the Anti-Second Law of Thermodynamics.  Take this morning, for instance.  Since we all ended up in the upstairs bathroom brushing our teeth together (the cats weren’t brushing; just assisting), we all decided to go into the basement and get in a workout.  The Beloved YMCA is closed, so we had to figure out our own thing.  Trish was on her recumbent bike.  I was on the treadmill.  Beau was on the yoga mat.  Bridget was losing her favorite Blue Ball behind some boxes.  Then Trish was lifting some weights, I was doing abs on the yoga mat, Beau was still on the yoga mat, Bridget was whining and furiously looking for her Blue Ball.  Did we need to be in that small space together?  No.  Did we get in each other’s way? Yes.  Were we ok with that?  Yes.  Did I find Bridget’s Blue Ball? Yes.  Did she lose it again in 2 minutes? Yes.

On Going to the Grocery Store  About the only outing we seem to be taking is to get fresh food.  I, fortunately, had gone to Costco and bought toilet paper because we actually needed it the week before the COVID hit the fan, so our focus is actually food.  We sometimes go together but I mostly do the grocery shopping because I enjoy it.  We have been on Weight Watchers, with gratifying success, since the start of the year so we shop mostly for produce, beans and spices.  I went yesterday for the weeks’ needs.   We were traumatized shopping in the “corona frenzy” last Friday morning, so I was a bit anxious.  The lot was not crowded, nor was the store, as we all sized each other up from a safe distance.  While there were signs of an on-going riot in the paper goods and spaghetti sauce aisles, the produce section continued to be a fine place to practice Social Distancing.  I strolled to the lettuce area, dismayed to see nearly empty racks of bagged greens.  Then I heard a voice around the corner say, “I got all the bags of spinach.”  I followed the voice to see a woman and her teenaged son reviewing their prize of about a half dozen bags of spinach.  I asked, “Did you take ALL the spinach?  Could I have just one bag?”  She didn’t want to give me one, I could tell, but she also couldn’t say no.  I thanked her and rolled off to get peppers and zucchini.  I didn’t even want spinach.  It was just the principle.  I saw her later when I was looking for ricotta and she was grabbing the last package of sliced cheddar.  I looked at her.  She asked if I wanted the bag of cheese.  I said no, but thank you.  Maybe I should have taken it.

On Going Stir Crazy  While I have established that we are both (all four of us?) Introverts Who are Happy to Stay Home, when you are somewhat REQUIRED to stay home it’s a bit different.  The one regular activity that we miss like crazy is our almost daily treks to the local YMCA.  It’s not just the exercise, although Trish misses her water aerobics as much as I miss my spin classes.  It’s the community of friends we miss, as well as the change of scenery.  After a morning at the Y, spending the afternoon reading and writing was a luscious indulgence.  Burn a little incense, make a cup of tea and I was in heaven.  Now, after an hour of reading (if that), I get nudgy.  To deal, we are taking walks around the neighborhood (with appropriate Social Distancing when we come across other people).  We had a neighborhood conversation yesterday with no one leaving the end of their driveways, and just yelling a bit to check in with each other.  Stuff is getting organized, although it still requires a little push for me to act.  But there is ONE thing that gets us excited every day.  The sound of the mail truck is like hearing the intoxicating melody of an ice cream truck.  “The MAIL!” one of us will exclaim, and we wait at the window until the truck is a few doors past ours to not look too anxious.  I create a distraction by “accidentally” kicking one of the cat bowls so Trish will clean it up (she’s obsessive about that) and I run outside.  It’s not like anything good ever comes in the mail anymore; nor are we forbidden to go outside and breath fresh air.  It’s just….good lord, I don’t even know WHAT it is!  But Sunday’s are hell.

On Getting on each Other’s Nerves  Lest you think our lives as near shut ins are all rainbows and unicorns, there are times when I have to go north and she needs to go south.  Little things start to rub.  I, for instance, eat too quickly and then get the hiccups.  I also talk back to the TV, particularly Pharma commercials and (increasingly) press conferences.  Trish has still not grasped the concept of recycling and I’m constantly fishing things out of the garbage to rinse and put in the bin.  Additionally, the logic this woman uses (or doesn’t) when it comes to loading a dishwasher is beyond me.  Who puts a small bowl in the middle of the empty bottom rack?  I also find it annoying that she so quickly came up with a list of things I do that annoy her.  Seriously, though, we do get on each other’s nerves at times which is not unexpected in a situation with the constant underlying stress of uncertainty.  In fact, I recently read that as the quarantine restrictions are being lifted in China that divorce filings are sky rocketing!  Yes, this is a time when we must all give each other a bit of grace!

What an amazing time this is for us all!  I cannot think of another instance when the entire world was dealing with the same crisis all at the same time.  This is different from being aware of a crisis.  The world responds when there is a hurricane somewhere, or we send all kinds of thoughts and prayers when there is some tragedy.  But those crises are all localized, even if the awareness is global.  This time, though, the crisis itself is global and we are connected enough to see it all unfold in real time.  We are seeing more and more instances of how this crisis is bringing out our collective humanity, which is heartening.  I, for one, have been vociferously thanking everyone working at the grocery stores when I go to shop.  Facebook is filled with things like free concerts from musicians, virtual art shows, famous actors reading books to kids, and all kinds of nice stuff—instead of all that nasty crap that had filled my News Feed so much that I was spending virtually no time on the app.  Finally, Facebook is doing again what it says it was built for—bringing people together.  My Mom’s Rabbi said in his video sermon this week that maybe this virus can be seen as the Universe sending us all a “timeout”.  Let’s use it for that.  We don’t need all the chaos and messed up priorities.  We need the humanity.  Please remember that when the shelter-in-place orders are lifted.  Trish and I put in our wedding vows that we would make sure we gave each other a good belly laugh every day.  It’s more important now than ever.